What can schools do about climate change? Click on the above mindmap to find out more. Special thanks to Sharon Genovese for creating this mindmap.

Despite having given talks to hundreds of students on global warming, I struggle to have conversations about this urgent issue with some of my closest friends and family.

Earlier this year at Easter lunch, I got into a heated argument on climate change with my cousin’s partner. I expected him to be concerned about climate change because he had two baby girls. He wasn’t. I tried mentioning the amount of money he could save by trading in his big SUV for a prius. He didn’t care about saving money. I talked above sea levels rising, resulting in millions of environmental refugees. Bad move. The more desperate I became, the more he switched off to what I was saying. I ended up walking away from our conversation feeling helpless and angry.

Since then there have been many occasions where I have sold out and not mentioned climate change, out of fear of being judged as an extremist or as coming across as a wet blanket. I lost my voice on this issue with the most important people in my life.

Fortunately, I’ve got my voice back and it’s stronger than ever before. Over the past two weeks I have been immersed in social science research on what appears to work and doesn’t work when talking to people about climate change.

With Christmas lunch on Tuesday, I will come face to face with my cousin’s partner again. I feel confident about having another conversation with him about climate change and what he can do to be part of the solution.

These are some of the things all of us climate advocates should attempt to apply when talking to people about climate change.

1. Keep it personal

If my cousin’s partner is living it up on the coast in Western Australia, why should he really be concerned about sea levels rising in Bangladesh? He wants to know how climate change relates to him. If possible we must show people how this issue will affect them, their children, their house, their pocket, their leisure activities, their street, their region, their country, etc.

2. Telling people what to do

Think of a time someone told you what to do. How did you react? You probably didn’t like it much. For this reason I must avoid telling my cousin’s partner what to do at all costs. It is far more effective to have people voluntarily change their behaviour.

3. Overcome their mental barriers

“If everyone knows about it, surely someone will do something about it?” and “I won’t do anything until others start taking action” are examples of mental barriers that stop people personally acting to address climate change. Barriers such as these should be acknowledged and addressed to help people move forward.

4. Balance the problems and solutions

When you look at the language used to describe the challenge of climate change it is often described as enormous and apocalyptic. The solutions however are often presented as small, cheap and easy (e.g. change a light bulb). When you consider the scale of the problem, one cannot help but think ‘Will changing a light bulb really be enough?’ To avoid letting my cousin’s partner fall into this mindset, I must make the size of the solution be as big as the size of the challenge.

5. Watch your language

If the person you are talking to is unaware of climate change, then using terms such as ‘carbon neutral’ or ‘carbon negative’ (that require a more in-depth knowledge), are likely to confuse them and put them off. It is important to speak the person’s language. As a general rule of thumb, use plain English.

6. Monetary rewards

There is a belief that you can change behaviours by showing people how their actions can save or earn them money. Research suggests that this idea is overrated and on its own may not lead to behaviour change.

7. The message: Focus on the losses

A decision must be made on whether to focus on the benefits of engaging in a particular sustainable behaviour or the losses people are suffering as a result of their current unsustainable behaviour. Research suggests that messages which emphasise the losses are consistently more persuasive than messages which emphasise savings as a result of taking action.

8. The message: Threatening

Threatening smoking advertisements can teach us a lot about effective climate change communication. A study exposing smokers to advertisements with the basic message of ‘Smoking can kill you’ found the advertisements did not motivate smokers to quit smoking. Many smokers became defensive, rejected the message, referred to articles that suggested smoking doesn’t kill you and some became so stressed they needed to have a cigarette during the advertisement.

By using threatening messages to communicate about climate change you run the risk of having people switch off and avoid thinking about it altogether. Threatening messages work best when combined with messages that empower the person to take action against the threat.